Sariel, the commander of the Heavenly Army. With
his tall, slender figure and light, prancing steps he wins his battles
against ferocious lobotomized creatures.
Shit … fuck … I’m gonna kill him when I see him
… I’m gonna …
Uriel: Well, I think we should first hear what
he has to say, he’s probably had a good reason to …
Lucifer: Good reason? A damn good reason it has
Michael: Hoho, what’s up? You seem to be
in a ‘kin bad mood, Luce.
Uriel: You see, Mike, yesterday Lucifer wanted
to check out the lay of the land in Rod’s Sanctuary. For our
“big move”, you know. Well, Luce wanted Raphael to accompany
Lucifer: … yeah, and he fucking DIDN’t
show up! Can you believe that? Not a word, nothing, he simply didn’t
show up. I waited for half a fucking hour, before cancelling the
whole project. I’m gonna crush him, I’m gonna …
Gabriel: … you’re gonna what? I bet
Raph has a good reason, and you’re gonna forgive him, as usual.
Nobody can be mad at Raphy for a long time and you know that, Luce.
So stop raving like a madman, it doesn’t suit you. Besides
… it makes me nervous.
Lucifer: Well, who asked for your opinion? I’m
not gonna forgive him so easily this time. You can be sure of that.
Gabriel: Yeah, yeah, I’ve heard that before.
Uriel: Be quiet, here’s Sariel coming. Better
he doesn’t hear what we’re up to.
Lucifer: Oh, shit, what’s HE doing here?
Sariel: Hi folks, what’s up?
Gabriel: Weeee’re fine, thank you. So, how’s
the air around the Big Boss? Thin as usual?
Sariel: Do I hear some sort of criticism? You know,
Rod is not so bad, I like working for him.
Lucifer: Yeah well, then go on and work for him.
Sariel: Oops, are we in a bad mood, Lucifer?
Gabriel: Nothing ever escapes your attention, Sariel,
huh? Yes! I think you could say, Luce is a bit pissed today.
Sariel: I saw you at the Sanctuary door yesterday
Lucifer: What? When?
Sariel: You know when. You didn’t see me,
but you looked pretty worried and angry.
Lucifer: Well, am I not allowed to be near the
Sanctuary? Can’t I go where I please? I’m not in a fucking
prison, am I?
Sariel: Calm down, no need to eat me. I just said
I saw you, I didn’t report you or anything.
Lucifer: Well, good thing you didn’t, cause
there’s no need to.
Sariel: Yeah, that’s what I thought too,
in the beginnning …
Uriel: … the beginning … ?
Gabriel: … the beginning of WHAT exactly?
Sariel: … well, shortly after you were gone,
Raphael arrived in full flight. He also seemed worried and looking
very guilty, so I just thought you two might have had an appointment.
Lucifer: Don’t you have anything else to
do the whole day than spy on the other angels? Did you get promoted
to Head of the Inquisition or what? Raph and me had no appointment
Gabriel: Nooo, and why should they? I think you’re
Raphael: Hmmm … hi guys … look I’m
sorry, Luce …
Lucifer: Well yeah, it’s ok Raph, don’t
Uriel: Nice day today, isn’t it? And look,
Sariel is here to keep us company. That’s nice of him, don’t
Raphael: Huh? What are you talking about? …
Oh, hi Sariel, I didn’t see you.
Sariel: Hello Raph. Still a bit tired I see. Were
you waiting long at the Sanctuary door yesterday?
Raphael: … What door? What do you mean?
Gabriel: He means, he saw you, is that so difficult
to understand, hmmm? Wake up, Raphy!
Raphael: Huh? Oh, fuck, I … ... Gabe, stop
tousling my hair. I can’t think straight if you do.
Lucifer: Look, Sariel, why don’t you just
fly up to Cloud Seven and see if you’re there? Can’t
you FEEL it when your presence is not wanted?
Uriel: I think we should all calm down here now,
folks. There’s no need to get excited.
Sariel: Yeah, no need at all. Ok, Luce, I’m
off, but I wanted to tell you guys, I know you’re up to something,
and I’m keeping an eye on you. So if there’s a problem,
you can talk to me.
Gabriel: Yeah, sure, you gonna be the angel we
seek out when we have a problem, don’t worry. Bye, bye now.
Lucifer: That sniveling spying rat of an angel
Uriel: Oh, come on, Luce, that’s unfair.
Just because he’s working for Rod’s army, doesn’t
make him a bad angel. I actually like him a lot.
Lucifer: Well, you like everybody, so that’s
not a reference.
Michael: No, but Sariel is ok, he is a mate and
can take a good drink.
Raphael: … Yeah I remember that last time
in the bar, we got so pissed … Hmmm, that was alright.
Gabriel: I think you should better keep a low profile
right now, Raphy. Just a friendly advice.
Lucifer: Yeah, about yesterday, so what’s
Gabriel: Too late …
Raphael: Hmmmm, … well … you know …
Lucifer: No, I DON’T know! I just know, Sariel
has seen me, he has seen you, and all for nothing, the only one
who hasn’t seen anything at all is ME, and I’M FUCKING
PISSED OFF FOR THAT, so why didn’t you show up when you were
supposed to? WHY?
Raphael: Ehh … well … to be honest
Gabriel: Being honest might not be your best move
now, in my humble angelic opinion …
Lucifer: No-one's been knocking on YOUR cloud,
smartass. I’m waiting …
Raphael: Oh, fuck, I overslept, ok? I told you,
we should postpone it to the afternoon. You know I’m not a
Lucifer: You SLEPT? You were ASLEEP while I was
freezing my ass off near the Sanctuary door, waiting for you? ARE
YOU MENTAL OR WHAT? What do you think this is, a game? I’m
fucking serious here, Raph.
Uriel: Well, Luce, he’s right, he sometimes
has problems waking up …
Lucifer: That’s not MY problem, he let me
down, and all just because he needed one more hour extra sleep.
Am I in a madhouse here?
Michael: Come, on, Luce, there’s gonna be
other opportunities. Next time, I’ll go with you, ok?
Lucifer: Well, if there IS a next time, now that
Sariel has seen us. Fuck! No, I wanted Raph to come with me, he’s
quieter than you. Nothing against you Mike, but as far as keeping
a low profile goes, there’s nobody better than Raph here and
you know that.
Gabriel: Yeah, pity our Raphy kept his low profile
in bed yesterday.
Raphael: No need to rub it in, Gabe. I’m
sorry, ok? I promise I’m gonna be on time next time. Ok?
Lucifer: You better be … ok, I changed the
plan a bit … so listen …