Hell Ain't A Bad Place

A story based on the myth of Persephone and Hades

This myth is trying to explain
For all who want to know
How Maiden never slaved in vain
To write great songs and stage their show

Sweet Charlotte was a muse to all
Her kiss got them inspired
Her fate decides their rise and fall
Great fame was soon acquired

A Killer album they released
The Metal fans they cheered
And after Number of the Beast
As Gods they were revered

Their songs went up into the sky
The earth was rocked, the moon
But also Hell, oh my, oh my,
Lend ear to Maiden's tune

Lord Eddie, king of Underworld
Awakening from his nap
Set eyes upon our Charlotte curled
Up in cute Davey's lap

Unholy lust in him awoke
"I need this lass, and now!"
With booming voice so Hell-Ed spoke
And soon he knew just how

He reckoned: Metal does the trick!
A bike straight out of hell
Bright steel, hard spikes, and quick
Abducted was the gal

A shadow fell upon the earth
The muse was gone, oh woe!
No riffs, no licks, no rhyme, no mirth
Again would Metal know

Just poser rock and disco beat
Just house and grunge and rap
No grander tunes, no epic feat
Just soulless, mindless crap

"I will not let my Maiden die"
Steve Harris then resolved
"And if I fail, at least I'll try
I must get Rod involved."

A strategy was quick outlined
To save the Metal muse
A contract must be made and signed
Cause Maiden need no ruse

A year in Hell, a London year
This was quite fair, for sure
And when to Hell goes Charlotte dear
The Maiden guys will tour

Each second year an album brought
So pleased was Ed in Hell
He got great music, all for naught
And Charlie's wares as well

This deal our Charlotte too enjoys
She says with smiling face:
"I love king Ed, I love my boys
And HELL is not so bad a place!"

(written on February 28th 2004)